Now the truth can be revealed: Apple keeps its billion-dollar war chest to hire comedy writers to work in its research and development department. But seriously, folks, the iPad has landed, and we’ve all got to deal with it––the name, that is. Maybe it’s just because “pad” sounds like a spruced up name for a feminine hygiene product, but we have to wonder––what else could Apple have called its latest creation?
Cube, Jr.
What? Because it looks so sleek and kinda square, that’s why. What did you think we meant? And just think of the commercials starring Cuba Gooding, Jr.––that’s synergy, baby!
PiPlate
The new tablet is nothing less than the ultimate intersection of smart design and flatness. It deserves a name that says, “Who else but Apple could serve up such a light and delicious browsing experience?”
FlapJackMac
Rumor has it this name was tossed out when the International House of Pancakes sent their lawyers to Cupertino. Those guys are worse than the RIAA.
Newton Pro
The Newton is back, and it’s better than ever...thanks to plenty of botox, liposuction, and extensive PR rehab. That “eat up Martha” thing? Never happened.
iPod touch Extreme
Come on, you were thinking it, too.
JDMacBass
January 27, 2010 at 9:30pm
But of course it was to be the "iPad." One of the first movies Steve demoed on the device was Star Trek. And as every trekker knows (from the Next Gen Tech Manual), the small, portable, touch screen, display/control devices piled on Captain Picard's desk were PADDs: Personal Electronic Display Devices. I kinda like that Apple's device is an expansive 10" by 8", while the PADD was (will be) a tidy 6" by 4". The PADD runs for 16 hours on its sarium power loop, but thanks to induction charging should never go dark. The iPad runs only for 10 hours but that isn't too shabby for this century. As soon as Steve adds voice control, a 4.3 kiloquad isolinear memory chip, and subspace transceiver assembly, we'll be nearly there. Engage! Maybe the next model will be built from transparent aluminum.
Zoidbert
January 27, 2010 at 9:26pm
I still wish they would have gone after the name PADD (a la STAR TREK). I know it's copyrighted, but so was "Mighty Mouse", "OS 9", and even "iPhone".
