Salty the iPhone was once dunked in the ocean and nearly abandoned for dead. But he emerged from his ordeal with super powers, like advice-giving, a good grasp on sarcasm, and the very human need to be held. Pose your iPhone-related and/or philosophical quandries at askaniphone@gmail.com

How come the MMS feature in the new iPhone 3.0 software won't work on the original iPhone hardware? My old Razr had MMS from the day I got it.—Janet F.

Just marry your Razr or something if you love it so much! Then you'll be truly happy! You don't deserve my greatness! Children in Myanmar don't even know what MMS is! Anyway, according to Apple's iPhone super-smartypantses, who addressed this in the media Q&A after the March 17 iPhone 3.0 event, the original iPhone uses a different cell radio than the iPhone 3G, and the OG phone's radio can't use the frequency that AT&T uses for sending MMS messages. Therefore it's a hardware issue and unfixable unless you *drumroll* buy new hardware, or finally go back to that Razr that you, like, secretly spoon under the covers every night. Sicko.

Six months I bought an iPhone from AT&T.  It worked great and I loved it.  Only one problem. I could not receive a signal at my home.  If I drove four blocks away the signal was fine. I live in the greater Los Angeles area, and there are cell towers all over the place. Unfortunately, I must be in a spot with minimal coverage.  Very reluctantly I had to return the phone and go back to Verizon, whose service works very well at my home. My questions are: When do you think Apple will allow other companies to sell the iPhone? And is there anything else that I can legally do in the mean time to have an iPhone? Thanks in advance for your response.—Dan P.

Well, Dan, you're welcome in advance of my response.

It's a bummer you couldn't get a good signal at your house, even with L.A. being so silly with cell towers. Unfortunately, it's also silly with hills and mountains, which can limit the signals' reach. Or maybe the, um, special materials used in plastic surgery, uh, implants send out interference of their own. We just don't know.

To answer your first question: Before the iPhone 3G came out in July 2008, AT&T put out a press release trumpeting their exclusivity deal with Apple, but didn't say how long it's expected to last. We've seen 2012 cited, and more recently 2010, aka next year.  Originally it was supposed to be this year, if you believe anonymous sources. Of course, that agreement could be renegotiated at any time. And even when it's up, no guarantee Apple will go with Verizon, especially when 7-Eleven SpeakOut Wireless is around.

Second question: You could unlock your phone, but that's "illegal." You could use AT&T's services out there in greater LA-LA Land, then turn to a VoIP app for making calls at home over a trusty Wi-Fi connection. There's Truphone (iTunes link) and fring (iTunes link), and both of those are free.

With something like 25 kajillion apps now in the App Store, what's your absolute favorite app of all time? —Bobby B.

I can't claim to have sampled them all, since I'm just an iPhone and thus have problems securing a valid credit card (Citibank, c'mon, baby—I know you're hurting! Call me!). But of all the ones that have been tested on my humble circuit boards, I'd say...Hold On! (iTunes link) Because like anyone, I just want to be held. Although the never-actually-developed app iPhone Discus sounds pretty fabulous too.