iPhone 3G Sick Day Tips

Robbie Baldwin's picture

iPhone 3G Sick Day Tips

 

 

The Boy Genius Report got a tip that the iPhone 3G will be launched at 8AM instead of the evening launch favored by Apple during the OG iPhone launch.

The early morning launch may be because of the in-store activation issue. No one wants to have their employees working until 5AM the next day activating iPhones. Think of the overtime!

If your original plan to leave work and get and iPhone is smashed by this leaked information, we have a few tips to help you call out sick on July 11.

Disclaimer: Seriously, if you get fired because you followed one of our tips, maybe you shouldn't have had that job in the first place. Don't blame us when you're checking email in the unemployment line.

Keep your trap shut: Do not talk about the iPhone 3G launch day at work. That's like talking about the sweet snowboarding trip you're going to take on a Thursday and then calling in sick that day. Your boss my seem brainless, but he/she will still notice the iPhone launch day haikus you placed on the bulletin board in the lunch room.

Preemptive sickness: Start getting sick on Thursday. Right after lunch complain to whoever is nearest to you about your sickness. When someone suggests you go home early, protest and remind them how much you value getting your work done. By the time you leave Thursday afternoon, you should have coworkers questioning your ability to drive home and your supervisor may suggest you stay home the next day.

Oh dear, my stomach: Order from the worst restaurant near your work. Inform everyone you're gonna bite the bullet and give that Mexican-Thai fusion place another go. You don't have to actually eat the food, just pretend too. No one will second guess you're early morning call complaining of stomach "issues."

Far, far away: Don't camp out at the Apple/AT&T store across the street from your work. Find a store far from your work and any eating establishments your coworkers may frequent.

The lines of communication: In your email or phone call to work, tell them you'll be checking your email periodically throughout the day. It gives the illusion that you're a diligent work even when sidelined by the Ebola virus. Remember to remove the "Sent from my iPhone" signature on your OG iPhone before replying.

No Comment: Don't talk to the local TV station. Monday is going to be awkward after your boss sees you on the evening news Friday night.

Bring a friend: When the office calls, let it go to voicemail. Have your friend hold your spot and go find somewhere quiet and call them back in your best sick voice. You know the voice, you used it to get out of going to school as a child. If it worked on your mom, it's bound to work wonders on your boss.

Keep your trap shut, part 2: Keep stories of the horrendous line you stood in for 13 hours on the down low at work. Instead, tell everyone how you picked up an iPhone while you were on your way to read to orphans. You thought the kids would get a kick out the GPS capabilities and the YouTube video of Polysics.

Remember, your best plan of action should involve common sense and as few variables as possible. The best plan is a simple plan.

Got some advice for your fellow iPhone enthusiasts? Share them in the comments. We're all in this together people. 

 

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yet another steve

... leave the phone at home. Yes, it is hard to do, and yes you could have plausibly bought it over the weekend. But you know your jealous co-workers will assume otherwise!

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Anonymous

Do what I did...

Get fired well before the 11th, and it's no longer a problem. (See above comment about unemployment lines)

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your old Guidance counselor

NOTE: if, as the previous poster suggests, have recently been fired adn lost your job...suggest strongly you rethink the idea of buying a new $300-400 iPhone just now..esp with the $60+ month data plan package contract.

PERHAPS, however...you can earn some serious beer and pizza money getting paid to stand in the iStore lines for other, gainfulyl employed folks... then it is a win-win!!

Go APple!

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Rev Matt

Or, you know, take a personal day to do it. "I will be out on July 11th for personal reasons" is good for doctor appointments, car maintenance, job interviews, or iPhone releases.

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