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#1 2007-10-04 10:26 pm
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Exposition:
So three years ago I decided to get "ordained" via Universal Life Church. It was done as part of an "object lesson". I had been given the opportunity to speak to a group of "church kids".
I had decided to do a very basic sermon on what do Christians do? I whipped out my shiny ULC Clergy card and passed it around. A lot of the kids were like "Wow. You're a minister!" and others were precociously skeptical. I then said "So you guys should be treating me with the same respect you give all the other pastors, right?"
It took a little prodding but after a few scattered "No" responses one of the kids piped up and said "But you don't do anything that pastor's do!" To which I responded "That's right and some of you in this room call yourselves Christians but you don't do anything that Christians do."
The room got really quiet.
All that to say:
Today I got to perform a wedding. I was given the honor to wed my wife's sister and her (now) husband. It definitely gave me a new perspective on marriage. I never thought it would be something that I would actually get to do. But opportunity met need and there I was.
It truly was a family affair. My wife was the matron of honor. Her brother's were some of the groomsmen. The groom's sister was one of the bridesmaids and did all the wedding "coordinating". Other relatives did hair, ran errands and decorated.
And I got to be pastor for a day. All in all a pretty memorable experience.
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
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#2 2007-10-04 10:28 pm
- mmonte
- iconoclast
- From: Colorado
- Registered: 2003-02-09
- Posts: 781
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Congrats, Rev!
...and the mountains rising nowhere...
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#4 2007-10-04 10:45 pm
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
None of my immediate family could attend but I called all of them shortly after. Both of my brothers responded similarly "What? Is that legal?" Yes. It satisfies the legal requirement.
My parents were more concerned with the emotional aspect. "Are their parents okay that it isn't a real minister". To which I replied "They were all fine with it." Shoot, even my uppity aunt-in-law was okay with it.
The bride and groom did a fabulous job putting the whole event together. So much of the wedding was clearly reminiscent of "them". This was their wedding and it was very, very nice.
I mean how many times have you heard a couple lament 'Well it wasn't how/what we wanted t do it but his/her parents wanted it" (whatever "it" is)?
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
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#5 2007-10-05 3:35 am
- D'Eyncourt
- OMGDICTATOR
- Registered: 2001-12-27
- Posts: 8808
- Website
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Heh--I like that: "isn't a real minister."
Congrats on your ordination and doing the ceremony and the additions to your family, Rev!
BOYCOTT SONY
"I think the question now is not whether you went to Vietnam or whether you didn't, whether you fought in the war or fought against the war. I think the only question is whether we can find a president smart enough never to make a mistake like that again"--Molly Ivins, way back in 1992
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#6 2007-10-05 7:33 am
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
A marriage is an oath to God and each other, not the minister.
Congrats! You married your sister in law!
"I'd rather be told, 'Have a nice day.' by someone who doesn't mean it, than 'F*** you!' by someone who does." - Lewis Black
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#7 2007-10-05 7:37 am
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
In Minnesota, even if you're ordained, you still have to have your paperwork filed with the county. Aaron is performing his cousin's wedding next summer. He's been a Reverend since he was a teenager (I guess so have I, for that matter). Fun stuff.
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#8 2007-10-05 8:11 am
- user
- Your plastic pal who's fun to be with
- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
- Registered: 2001-10-15
- Posts: 16033
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
In Penn., you can self-marry. No officiant needed at all. One couple had their dog "preside".
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#9 2007-10-05 10:33 am
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
After a particularly disastrous first marriage, and a pastor that I'd happily engage in fisticuffs with, my sister remarried again earlier this year to a, while crazy Fox News fanatic, still a better, hard-working guy. I didn't have any objections.
So on my lunch break I went over to the courthouse, mostly because my sister is about as much into raising the ire of people as I am and refused to have another damn huge wedding, instead opting to have a judge officiate.
Well. Judge said he was going to be there and wasn't.
I, too, had Univeral Life ordination mostly so that the group of old men at the youth center I worked at, now approaching two years ago, would have to refer to me in meetings as "Reverend". Mostly because I'm an smurf.
So we went down the street and invaded the Methodist church because it's sanctuary was open, did the ceremony and filed appropriate paperwork for them to get their license later and ta-da.
Our days are numbered, though, Spiff
Spirit was crushed; now is fading, But I want to help make things right.
Because I can see and I can feel, and you can see and you can feel
So why don't we both either stand up and fight
Or at least together we'll call it a night.
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#10 2007-10-05 11:35 am
- kman
- Member
- Registered: 2002-02-03
- Posts: 1350
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Real minister? Feh. I'd rather be married by someone I was close to than someone who barely knows me or my fiancee.
I believe in Karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day long and I assume they deserve it.
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#11 2007-10-05 11:58 am
- Pithecanthropus
- Roast Master
- From: St. Cloud, MN
- Registered: 2002-12-30
- Posts: 4452
- Website
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Can I get absolution, Spiff? I mean without confessing? C'mon, do a guy a favor!
Grandfatherly advice: You can drink 'em pretty, but you can't drink 'em smart.
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#12 2007-10-05 12:05 pm
- user
- Your plastic pal who's fun to be with
- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
- Registered: 2001-10-15
- Posts: 16033
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Spiff is selling likker now? I'd rather have Stollie.
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#13 2007-10-05 1:06 pm
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
The best part was when I walked back to the bar and said "Red Hook, ESB?"
"Here you go, Pastor"
Thank you.
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
Where forums are fun again: macstack
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#14 2007-10-05 1:08 pm
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Phydeaux wrote:
I like the quote below the article. How can you blame your bad marriage on the person who signed your marriage liscense?
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
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#15 2007-10-05 1:10 pm
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Pithecanthropus wrote:
Can I get absolution, Spiff? I mean without confessing? C'mon, do a guy a favor!
I'm not familiar with the terminology...
But I am in a giving kind of mooooood. So... : grants absolution:
Did anyone else just hear thunder?
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
Where forums are fun again: macstack
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#16 2007-10-05 1:12 pm
- user
- Your plastic pal who's fun to be with
- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
- Registered: 2001-10-15
- Posts: 16033
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Either no one got my bad pun or it's so bad you're ignoring it.
: snif :
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#17 2007-10-05 1:16 pm
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
user wrote:
Either no one got my bad pun or it's so bad you're ignoring it.
: snif :
The Red Hook comment was in direct relation to your stollie's pun. Should I have used a vodka term as well?
edit: that's two "l"s
Last edited by SpacemanSpiff (2007-10-05 1:18 pm)
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
Where forums are fun again: macstack
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#18 2007-10-05 1:20 pm
- user
- Your plastic pal who's fun to be with
- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
- Registered: 2001-10-15
- Posts: 16033
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Damn you managed to out-nuance ME.
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#19 2007-10-05 5:18 pm
- Sputnickey
- Dictator for Life
- From: around
- Registered: 2003-09-25
- Posts: 932
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
user wrote:
Damn you managed to out-nuance ME.
zing!
When I was around 8 or so (and really into pirates) I kind of wanted to be a captain of a ship for the sole reason of being able to marry people. In retrospect it seems absurd but at the time I could think of nothing cooler
...but hey, what do I know
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#20 2007-10-05 6:42 pm
- user
- Your plastic pal who's fun to be with
- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
- Registered: 2001-10-15
- Posts: 16033
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Marry people??
Most kids wanna makem walk the plank!
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#21 2007-10-05 6:52 pm
- Greywolf
- Member
- Registered: 2002-03-04
- Posts: 491
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
user wrote:
Marry people??
Most kids wanna make em walk the plank!
Same thing. 
"After all, it's not that awful, in Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, bloodshed - they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, five hundred years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock."
-Graham Greene, The Third Man
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#22 2007-10-05 8:54 pm
- Nefarious
- Tuning Fork
- Moderator
- From: 45°22"N 84°57"W
- Registered: 2002-09-30
- Posts: 7998
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Congrats on the Exposition and the wedding.
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#23 2007-10-06 1:10 am
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Nefarious wrote:
Congrats on the Exposition and the wedding.
Thanking you.
We had a post wedding get together tonight. It was a ton of fun. I really didn't have words to express my gratitude,
But, I did have 6 beers. Wait. Is that important?
Anyway, they graciously thanked me but I just wanted them to know how honored I was to have preformed the ceremony.
Woooo. Still a little tipsy.... I love me some bicardi....
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
Where forums are fun again: macstack
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#24 2007-10-06 2:07 am
- thelegendofjohn
- I know.
- From: A Basement On The Hill.
- Registered: 2006-08-20
- Posts: 1390
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
SpacemanSpiff wrote:
Nefarious wrote:
Congrats on the Exposition and the wedding.
Thanking you.
We had a post wedding get together tonight. It was a ton of fun. I really didn't have words to express my gratitude,
But, I did have 6 beers. Wait. Is that important?
Anyway, they graciously thanked me but I just wanted them to know how honored I was to have preformed the ceremony.
Woooo. Still a little tipsy.... I love me some bicardi....
Marrying people while drunk sounds like it could be an adventure. 
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#25 2007-10-06 2:17 am
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: That's Reverend SpacemanSpiff
Well, from a legal aspect, we still haven't signed the license. But that's okay. In WA you have 60 days to get the license back.
.. love me some bicardi....
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
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