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Did you actually mean that you were going to change your name and hightail it to Mexico after taking out huge loans?

Wow, I tell my therapists I've been suicidal since childhood and they just tell me to call the hotline if I get too agitated.  Although I had to call the cops on myself a few times because my alcoholic mom was throwing furniture at me and referring to me as her "big mistake."

Cheers!

If you have an 8 year old that's threatening suicide, you need to get her to a doctor ASAP. That is not normal behavior, and it isn't for you to decide if she's serious or not.


Davic3: i don't know what to say. Hang in there is just so inadequate.

wrote:

If you have an 8 year old that's threatening suicide, you need to get her to a doctor ASAP. That is not normal behavior, and it isn't for you to decide if she's serious or not.

She's been under a therapist's care for more than a year and we are actively working on the situation.  It's just been getting worse recently.


Keep in the fight Davic3, and I apologize for hijacking your thread.

Last edited by Imperial (2009-03-09 3:37 pm)

Yeah, sounds like you have a good friend.

I'll echo what others have said; it sounds like you have a good friend.  Keep that in mind when you are feeling low.

Best wishes, truly.

This is the 3rd son she's lost to suicide

mrreet2001 wrote:

This is the 3rd son she's lost to suicide

Seconded. That's "there's something in the water" territory right there - crosses the line from sad to creepy/scary.

Fried Chicken wrote:

Anytime anyone thinks about committing suicide, I just don't understand.

Based on your insight into this matter I would say that you are absolutely correct. You don't understand a smurfing thing.

"Suicide is a pretty hostile act."

-Dr. Laura Schlesinger


What's missing from this thread so far is any appropriate, healthy anger towards those who kill themselves or threaten to.

Killing yourself means you really, really do not give a damn about the people and/or animals who love and need you. It is the ultimate act of self-absorbed, narcissistic spite and/or laziness and/or cowardice.

Telling your friends and family that you're going to kill yourself, meanwhile, is a sickeningly manipulative thing to do, especially if you're not going to stick to your word and actually do it. Share that information with a therapist, clergy, or suicide hotline volunteer who's not personally involved in your pathetic little life and will therefore not be unduly burdened by this knowledge.

Yes, yes, I know that suicidal depression is probably a mental illness, and it should probably be addressed as such, without kinds of moral judgments I'm expressing, but I just really, really hate it when people will take the fact that you're dumb enough to care about them and use that as a weapon against you.

When I become Monarch-for-life of Planet Earth, it will be against the law to make threats of suicide, and a first-time conviction will carry a mandatory death sentence.

Davic3, none of these remarks are aimed at you, by the way. I'm just venting my spleen about the vast multitude of selfish, destructive people that I've known or that have hurt people I've known.

Grrrrrr!

I can judge all I want then.

I had a pretty nasty bout of depression. I was forced to go to the "Doctors"** and instead of helping me work through my problems and find a solution they just put me on anti-depression pills (which gave me ED while I was on them, which depressed me even more.) and one of the "Doctors" even had the balls of rolling his eyes at one of the issues I had originally causing the depression.

** replace "Doctors" with over-payed worthless smurfs

Fried Chicken wrote:

Take her out of therapy.  Putting her into therapy lets her rationalize being different.
Next time she says something about suicide, tell her she's an idiot and mock her... don't act like you don't care, on the contrary, give her a hug or something, and tell her like "Stop worrying, you haven't got it all that bad", in a calm reassuring voice... or try like "Now why would you do that", in a calm reassuring voice.  Don't take it seriously, if it's a cry for attention, it's clearly working.

Thanks for your suggestion, but you are wrong.  You have no idea of our situation. 

My daughter suffers from Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), we adopted her out of the state foster care system.  She was removed (along with her sister) from her mother's care due to the meth lab her mom was running out of their home as well as being so malnourished her hair and teeth were falling out.   Her mom spent her days wasted on drugs and alcohol.  She ate on average once a week when her grandfather would come and get her.  One of her mother's boyfriends was killed execution style in front of her and she was left to keep him alive while her mom hid their drugs.  Another boyfriend died of an overdose in their lab.  She has born almost every type of physical abuse that you can imagine, perhaps even sexual abuse (we don't know of any at the moment, but she exhibits signs of sexual abuse).

I tell you this so you can understand a little of what RAD means.  She cannot (right now) form attachments with adults.  She views every adult through the prism of those that abused her.  No matter our behavior, she can't separate us from those that made her suffer.  She's been with us for two years and been cared for as our own yet she is unable to distinguish us from her abusers.  She's spent the past two years trying to prove to herself that we are just as bad as those that used to beat her.  She tries to provoke us to fail so that she can validate her opinion of adults.  If I turned on her as you suggested, she would say to herself "see they don't really care about me."  We've spent two years trying to build a relationship with her and trying to build her trust in us, and if we mocked her like that, it would blow any chance we would have.  Lying, manipulation, and control are the three things that we are battling.  She is brilliant, wickedly manipulative, and constantly scheming to control everything around her (if we can't help her deal with this, she's either going to end up in prison, or have a brilliant career as a politician), and her threatening suicide is probably an attempt to control us.  So forgive me if I don't take your advice.