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#1 2003-10-27 8:52 am
- benightedbastard
- Cheap and Juicy!
- From: Western Australia
- Registered: 1999-06-03
- Posts: 28733
- Website
What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
We've had a thread on the stupidest thing you've stolen, how about the stupidest things that could be stolen?
Standard disclaimer, this is neither a suggestion box or a shopping list. No reading this and getting light-fingered, lest you incur the wrath of something or other very bad.
My suggestion is stealing a whole roll of subway club stamps.
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#2 2003-10-27 9:00 am
- pottymouth
- Uncreative
- Moderator
- From: JP, MA
- Registered: 2002-02-06
- Posts: 17408
- Website
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
My suggestion is stealing a whole roll of subway club stamps.
How is that stupid? Free sammiches!
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#3 2003-10-27 9:06 am
- benightedbastard
- Cheap and Juicy!
- From: Western Australia
- Registered: 1999-06-03
- Posts: 28733
- Website
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Call it funny stupid, then.
Besides, you'd have to ask for a new card every time you went in, unless you had the forethought to steal those too.
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#4 2003-10-27 9:17 am
- registered_user
- bulletproof
- From: padding: zero-pixels;
- Registered: 2000-12-19
- Posts: 16026
- Website
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
thousands of mp3 files.
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#5 2003-10-27 9:33 am
- Imperial
- Powered by The Cheat
- From: Michigan, USA
- Registered: 2000-10-12
- Posts: 425
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
I had a friend get busted for stealing $2 worth of kool-aid. He had $80 in his pocket. When he got busted the store took $40 as restitution, plus he got about 50 hours community service. $2 worth of kool-aid turned out to be a bit more expensive
Never Pick Up A Minja.
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#6 2003-10-27 9:37 am
- NAG
- A witch!
- Royal Wombat
- From: /usr/local/apps/nag
- Registered: 2000-09-22
- Posts: 30229
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
One of those Police GPS tracker things.
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#7 2003-10-27 9:42 am
- secretingredient
- Member
- From: NYC
- Registered: 2001-08-16
- Posts: 461
- Website
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
The stupidest thing to steal?
A security device.
(a lock, The Club, etc)
The most-brain-damaged-stupidest thing to steal?
A store anti-theft device.
(admittedly, it might be fun to set off store alarms if you're wearing just a t-shirt and shorts)
http://www.infinitewheel.com - for when your brainwaves are altered.
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#8 2003-10-27 9:42 am
- ZeBlunt
- Member
- From: Duluth, MN
- Registered: 2001-12-13
- Posts: 243
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Condoms.
Because there are lots and lots and lots of places to get them for free.
Disclaimer: Yes, I know it's not stupid everywhere.
If masturbating was s'posed to be cute, pink bunnies would do it in meadows and they'd ejaculate rainbows and flower petals
R*K*MILHOLLAND
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#9 2003-10-27 9:43 am
- PuddleMonkey
- Member
- From: down with the cheese-whiz
- Registered: 2003-05-06
- Posts: 3571
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Other people's underwear.
I'm so liberal, I have to sit to the left of PETA!
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#10 2003-10-27 9:44 am
- Marc
- On the run from the MPAA
- Registered: 2003-05-10
- Posts: 13129
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
[looks at question in differant light]
best friend's girlfriend
You know the hole, the one you put the pie in?
My mean my pie-hole?
Yeah, shut it.
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#12 2003-10-27 10:44 am
- Tria
- Minor Prophetess
- From: Madison, WI
- Registered: 2000-05-13
- Posts: 18087
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Candy from a vending machine... By trying to shake it out of the vending machine.
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#13 2003-10-27 10:49 am
- benightedbastard
- Cheap and Juicy!
- From: Western Australia
- Registered: 1999-06-03
- Posts: 28733
- Website
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Oh man, that is a stupid one.
Wasn't there a thief who broke into a cheese shop (or similar) and ate himself silly?
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#14 2003-10-27 10:53 am
- benightedbastard
- Cheap and Juicy!
- From: Western Australia
- Registered: 1999-06-03
- Posts: 28733
- Website
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Candy from a vending machine... By trying to shake it out of the vending machine.
...and pulling a homer simpson by dropping it on yourself?
I stole drinks from a vending machine by tipping it forward once. It wasn't a very smart vending machine design.
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#15 2003-10-27 11:00 am
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Candy from a vending machine... By trying to shake it out of the vending machine.
I once noticed a machine had a hole in it near the controls. You could clearly see a button on the inside marked "Free Vend".
I stuck my finger in the machine and pushed the button. Every mechanism started moving and the vending machine completely emptied.
Yummy!
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
Where forums are fun again: macstack
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#17 2003-10-27 11:06 am
- SpacemanSpiff
- Stupendous Man
- From: Transmogrifier
- Registered: 2001-07-31
- Posts: 5536
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
A cop car. And yes, a guy here did that a couple of weeks ago.
When I lived elsewhere, some guy stole a personal car that belong to a police officer.
"The first time one sees natural beauty which is privately owned; oceans as people's back yards, confounds the senses. I didn't know God had a a toy store for the rich." -- Spanglish
Where forums are fun again: macstack
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#18 2003-10-27 11:10 am
- Tria
- Minor Prophetess
- From: Madison, WI
- Registered: 2000-05-13
- Posts: 18087
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Candy from a vending machine... By trying to shake it out of the vending machine.
...and pulling a homer simpson by dropping it on yourself?
If it's good enough for a Darwin award, it's good enough for me. 
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#19 2003-10-27 11:51 am
- joseph_tso
- Member
- From: Austin, TX
- Registered: 2002-07-04
- Posts: 984
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
trying to steal a whole frozen turkey.
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#20 2003-10-27 5:22 pm
- SwisSlesS
- Member
- From: Home of the Massholes
- Registered: 2002-06-19
- Posts: 8307
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
A cop car. And yes, a guy here did that a couple of weeks ago.
Dammit, you beat me! I was reading through to see if anyone had posted that yet. 
I'm a dog, spelled backwards.
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#21 2003-10-27 5:28 pm
- Blueboy626
- Member
- From: Chicago, IL USA
- Registered: 1999-10-30
- Posts: 3300
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Bottled water or canned air. 
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#22 2003-10-27 5:42 pm
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Did anyone else notice this? "The school gets one to five cheese thefts a week and this is how we plan to continue dealing with the problem."
Okay. $396 * 5 every week to teach those damn kids that they're costing themselves $1.25 in books every week. Oh, wait...
Sounds like a case of Administratus Assholius to me.
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#23 2003-10-27 6:23 pm
- jkahless
- Member
- From: Right in front of you.
- Registered: 2002-01-05
- Posts: 10014
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Wel, its not really stupid and I don't think its stealing, but at some coffee machines if you press the a hidden button you can get cheap or even free coffee.
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#24 2003-10-27 6:48 pm
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
a 60-pound sack of potatoes. yes, this did happen.
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#25 2003-10-27 6:55 pm
- elpato84
- is Heavy Weapons Guy
- From: red team
- Registered: 2002-05-25
- Posts: 3306
Re: What is the stupidest thing you could steal?
Stealing money.
Why be so indecisive that you need to get money, then the product you want? Skip the middle man.
"I personally think that with the budget they've planned, Halo [the movie] will be a failure. I think Halo will not make the money back in the end."
-Uwe Boll (made the films: Alone in the Dark, House of the Dead, Bloodrayne, Far Cry, Postal)
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