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#2 2005-01-03 1:27 pm
Re: bad analogies
Russel Beland has a few in that list, are these from a contest of some sort?
......Jeff pondered this idea like a monkey ponders whether to scratch its butt.
"I'd rather be told, 'Have a nice day.' by someone who doesn't mean it, than 'F*** you!' by someone who does." - Lewis Black
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#3 2005-01-03 4:34 pm
- Ugly American
- Member
- Registered: 2002-01-17
- Posts: 142
Re: bad analogies
Say some of those out-loud to yourself in the cliche stoner voice. They are great.
But then there were a few of them that I thought were Delilo style poetic, like:
"'From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie,surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and "Jeopardy" comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.'
Roy Ashley, Washington "
Although slightly bored I keep reading these analogies like the child who eats too much candy and starts to feel sick on a cold, clear day after Halloween.
"One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star"
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#4 2005-01-03 4:54 pm
- DevoDoc
- Vardøger
- From: The East Wing
- Registered: 2003-05-27
- Posts: 2711
Re: bad analogies
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
I think this one is my favorite...
This one is stolen from Douglas Adams.
Something along the lines of, "the spaceship hung in the air in exactly the way bricks don't."
We also know how cruel the truth often is, and we wonder whether delusion is not more consoling. - Henri Poincaré
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#6 2005-01-03 11:55 pm
- Slarty
- Member
- From: MAF. Duh.
- Registered: 2002-08-25
- Posts: 1938
Re: bad analogies
A local classic:
...please be constructive in your criticism rather than going off like a bucket of prawns in the sun.
Git off my lawn, ya durn kids!
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#7 2005-01-04 12:11 am
- benightedbastard
- Cheap and Juicy!
- From: Western Australia
- Registered: 1999-06-03
- Posts: 28733
- Website
Re: bad analogies
I popped into this thread to say it feels like the forums have undergone some sort of time-shift. First RDC reared his ugly head, then cake, now slarts. Eerie.
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#8 2005-01-04 12:19 am
- Slarty
- Member
- From: MAF. Duh.
- Registered: 2002-08-25
- Posts: 1938
Re: bad analogies
I popped into this thread to say it feels like the forums have undergone some sort of time-shift. First RDC reared his ugly head, then cake, now slarts. Eerie.
The joy has gone out of licking zz's ass now that he's a daddy. 
Git off my lawn, ya durn kids!
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#9 2005-01-04 9:25 am
- C. Ives
- We're All Mad Here
- From: Wonderland
- Registered: 2001-03-05
- Posts: 2065
Re: bad analogies
The foot massages, however, never get old.
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#10 2005-01-04 10:57 am
#11 2005-01-04 11:29 am
- Z
- Member
- From: Miami
- Registered: 2003-07-03
- Posts: 2257
Re: bad analogies
Someone sent this to me, and it was amusing enough I thought you all should see it too:
[snip]
I think these are past entries from this contest.
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#12 2005-01-04 8:49 pm
- ironhawk
- Shai Dorsai!
- From: San Francisco
- Registered: 2001-10-16
- Posts: 3080
Re: bad analogies
"...going down the toilet faster than an unwanted pregnancy on prom night."
All posts on the internet are postfixed by an invisible "IMHO". It's not in the html code, either.
-titok16
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#13 2005-01-04 9:34 pm
- lord funk
- Title
- Registered: 2000-12-11
- Posts: 2276
Re: bad analogies
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
I think this one is my favorite...
Douglas Adams or not, I love it.
In and around the lake,
Mountains come out of the sky
And they stand there!
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