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#1 2006-03-13 9:55 pm
- Duke Stratosphere
- Winter Rebel

- From: Iowa
- Registered: 2003-12-10
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Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Oh, my God!
Jeez, what a whiner! Poor sonofabitch was unemployed for, like, 30 years until South Park gave him a job, and now he's quitting just because they made fun of his religion. Like there's a religion on Earth they haven't made of.
I'm pretty upset. My favorite show just won't be the same any more.
I ... I need a moment ...
"Make the most of the hemp seed. Sow it everywhere." --George Washington (No party)
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#2 2006-03-13 10:19 pm
- bratboy
- laden with emotion
- Royal Wombat

- From: Austin, Texas
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
I think they try too hard.
"One thing we've learned is there's a difference between being disappointed and having madmen in authority."
--Paul Krugman
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#3 2006-03-13 11:18 pm
- KingFred
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Well, honestly, after running for 9 years, I think you could say that about nearly any tv show.
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#4 2006-03-13 11:24 pm
- ShnickyShnack
- ::: title edited due to Satanic influences :::

- From: Rockin' out
- Registered: 2001-05-25
- Posts: 22237
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
bratboy wrote:
I think they try too hard.
Note: please delete this post.
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#5 2006-03-13 11:26 pm
- Warin
- Maple Leaf Wag

- From: Canada
- Registered: 2003-09-21
- Posts: 2431
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Good god.
What a freaking hypocrite.
they have been lampooning Christianity for YEARS and ole Chef is right there givin advice to the little crackers. If he quit over the Scientology episode, then he has some serious issues and the show is better off without him.
From what I can tell, either way, you're screwed. Bad people are punished by society's laws, and good people are punished by Murphy's Law.
-- George, Dead Like Me
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#6 2006-03-13 11:36 pm
- KingFred
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
It'll be interesting to see how they explain Chef's disappearance in the show. Or perhaps, since it's only the voice, the character can stay on, though it may be simpler to introduce a new cook. That would avoid future lawsuits where Mr Hayes might claim he has some ownership in the Chef character.
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#7 2006-03-14 12:05 am
- mo' ron
- PS3 4 EVA

- From: NC, USA
- Registered: 2002-10-15
- Posts: 14254
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
This is good for South Park. They lose some dead weight, and it gives them lots of creative options.
South Park is not a show to get stuck in one way of doing things... they can make drastic changes with very little fallout (remember how the whole killing Kenny thing came about? And saying "smurf"? I'm sure they're more examples, but i'm a South Park n00b).
What is the difference between Vista and OSX?
- Microsoft employees are excited about OSX.
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#8 2006-03-14 12:08 am
- Duke Stratosphere
- Winter Rebel

- From: Iowa
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
They could always
have Chef's gay gene suddenly activate and give him a sex change.
but I guess then they'd have to explain why Chef's voice actually changed when Mrs. Garrison's didn't.
"Make the most of the hemp seed. Sow it everywhere." --George Washington (No party)
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#10 2006-03-14 6:47 am
- Sternum
- Slathered in barbecue sauce

- From: Ribcage
- Registered: 2002-01-10
- Posts: 3350
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Who is the religious freak who celebrities think is really neat?
Hubbard!
Can you dig it? And who is the cat who keeps the aliens off our back?
Hubbard! L. Ron Hubbard.
Damn straight!
Last edited by Sternum (2006-03-14 6:49 am)
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#11 2006-03-14 10:06 am
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Oh my. Isaac must have a big ol' thetan up his ass. The Scientologists almost make the Mormons seem normal.
Hopefully they'll find a good replacement for Chef.
It is an odd thing, but every one who disappears is said to be seen at San Francisco. It must be a delightful city, and possess all the attractions of the next world.
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#12 2006-03-14 10:07 am
- Duke Stratosphere
- Winter Rebel

- From: Iowa
- Registered: 2003-12-10
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Sternum wrote:
Who is the religious freak who celebrities think is really neat?
Hubbard!
Can you dig it? And who is the cat who keeps the aliens off our back?
Hubbard! L. Ron Hubbard.
Damn straight!
Shut yo' mouth! 
[strings]La.......la la la la la......[/strings]
Hubbard!
"Make the most of the hemp seed. Sow it everywhere." --George Washington (No party)
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#13 2006-03-14 11:23 am
- KingFred
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
robco wrote:
Oh my. Isaac must have a big ol' thetan up his ass. The Scientologists almost make the Mormons seem normal.
Hopefully they'll find a good replacement for Chef.
A big ol' what?? 
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#15 2006-03-14 11:58 am
- Warin
- Maple Leaf Wag

- From: Canada
- Registered: 2003-09-21
- Posts: 2431
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Operation Clambake is an excellent resource for all things Scientology.
I hung out on a.r.s. for awile, and it was amazing what happened around there. Ever few weeks there would be a flood of binary postings of the most vile porn, most of it illegal in nature (kiddie porn
) geared to getting the group shut down. All because people posted there about the darker side of Scientology, the side you dont hear about from Tom and Isaac and others. I met a few people whose lives had been completely screwed up by their time in Scientology.
Last time I was in Vancouver, I walked by the "Church" of Scientology, and if I hadnt just relieved myself after lunch... I would have pissed all over the front of their building.
Yikes. Isnt this the rant room???
From what I can tell, either way, you're screwed. Bad people are punished by society's laws, and good people are punished by Murphy's Law.
-- George, Dead Like Me
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#16 2006-03-14 12:36 pm
- El Light Borus
- Sick little monkey

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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Hayes has no problem when South Park slams damn near every other religion on the planet, but $cientologists are notorious for having no sense of humor when it comes to their own "faith". Ugh. Maybe he'll hide in a closet and refuse to come out.
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#17 2006-03-14 1:14 pm
- Tallgeese
- Sternly Advising
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
I'm surprised he hasn't started a lawsuit. It's like the Scientologist version of embassy bombing.
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#18 2006-03-14 3:22 pm
- user
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- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
What's he been doing all of these years? Secretly planning to convert Stone and Parker?
He had to have known they would bite Scienterrific-ology sometime!
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#19 2006-03-14 7:38 pm
- radarman
- Member

- Registered: 2005-02-28
- Posts: 3629
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
I personally have a hard time seeing how anyone can buy into Scientology, especially after some of the comments Hubbard made before he started the "religion", and afterwards.
My personal favorite was this one:
A Reader's Digest article of May 1980 quoted Hubbard as saying in the 1940s "Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man really wants to make a million dollars, the best way would be to start his own religion."
Two years later, according to the wiki, Forbes wrote that Scientology had pulled in $40 million US. That was 24 years ago - who knows how much money has been pulled in. Prophetic, isn't it?
Last edited by radarman (2006-03-15 8:29 am)
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#20 2006-03-15 2:21 am
- KingFred
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
radarman wrote:
Two years later, according to the wiki, Forbes wrote that Scientology had pulled in $40 US. That was 24 years ago - who knows how much money has been pulled in. Prophetic, isn't it?
40 bucks??
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#21 2006-03-15 7:18 am
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
KingFred wrote:
It'll be interesting to see how they explain Chef's disappearance in the show. Or perhaps, since it's only the voice, the character can stay on, though it may be simpler to introduce a new cook. That would avoid future lawsuits where Mr Hayes might claim he has some ownership in the Chef character.
South Park likes to play with the conventions of television and popular culture. Replacing a character is just the kind of thing they'll have a lot of fun with. Maybe they'll keep chef and give him the voice of Mr. Derp.
"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down.'"
-- Bob Newhart
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#22 2006-03-15 7:20 am
- Pariah
- James Carville Fan..

- From: Belly Of The Beast, Oklahoma!
- Registered: 2001-05-24
- Posts: 18425
Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
ya see there were the 76 over populated planets so the leader took a few trillion of his people and brought them here and dumped them into volcanoes, then for good measure blew them up with super nukes or something.
So after that the Earth gets haunted by these trillions of pissed off "thetens" who are, even as I type this, crawling all over each and every one of us making us do and think bad things.
"and it's not surprising that they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren't like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations."
Barack Obama
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#23 2006-03-15 8:02 am
- user
- Your plastic pal who's fun to be with

- From: I'm not getting you down, am I
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
Scientology seems really crazy now, but remember, it's a modern religion. 2000 years from now this stuff is going to be serious. This is how religions actually get started.
My personal theory is that ol L Ron was drinking in a bar one night, telling tall tales. The next day, his phone rings. It's a guy who was in the bar who wants Hubbard to tell him more. Hung over, Ron croaks: huh?
Then the guy says: I'll pay you!
Aw, he's no fun, he fell right over.
Unless you become as little children, there's no way you will believe this crap.
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#24 2006-03-15 9:52 am
- sturner
- Royal High Poobah
- Moderator

- From: Carrollton, TX USA
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
And to top it off, Hubbard writes bad Sci-Fi, and worse, is a truely hackneyed writer.
I'm not dead yet.
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#25 2006-03-15 10:00 am
- dv
- Negusa Negest
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- From: Minneapolis, MN
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Re: Hayes can't take heat, gets out of kitchen
sturner wrote:
And to top it off, Hubbard writes bad Sci-Fi, and worse, is a truely hackneyed writer.
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