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jondaris wrote:

ReallyReallyLong LongName wrote:

I guess you don't get out much cause everyone else understood it was joke. Anyway, now that you know you can join too.

I take it that means no, you haven't.

Dito.

Do you really care or want to know how many girls I've been with? If I told you 1 or 1000 would it make any difference to you? So... whats your point?

ahah, I know... you wanna be my first. Sorry man(I assume you are) I'm not like that... and your a little late. Maybe next time tho... I promise. Really. No, come on stop... HEY!... DAMMIT, LEAVE MY SHOES ALONE!

But if you really are a hot girl that want's to jump my bones then please disregard the above, I was lying.. I'm a virgin, I've never even had a wet dream... I promise. Really. No, don't stop... HEY!... DAMMIT, LEAVE YOUR SHOES ALONE!

The Cynic wrote:

Calm down, chill'uns.

I'm sorry but I dont think thats a very good line...

Heres a really bad one that actually did work for me.... I have no idea how... It's not actually a one liner tho.

Her: You make me nervous.
Me: Why?
Her: I don't know but my heart is beating out of my chest.
Me: Can I feel?
Her: OK
Me: *Grab*
Her: Oh my, yer so bad...
Me: And yer so good!

... I guess it was kinda close to her heart right?

....she must have wanted it or somthing. Too bad, cause that was my first time intentionally copping a feel, and I was also too damn nervous to go even further... Did I mention I was at work? And no I didn't get a home run... My morals told me not to have sex with a married woman... Stupid morals!

But hey, atleast they told me I can feel her up.

Edit:

LOL.. as I read that dialog over, it sounds like really bad porn lines. But I swear I could not make that up even if I wanted to.

Last edited by ReallyReallyLong LongName (2006-07-28 7:16 am)

you don't sweat much for a fat chick.     for use at that gym.    worked once, got me slapped once.  stopped using it after that.

Last edited by Donkey Butter (2006-07-28 9:09 am)

The funny thing is, these actually have a better chance of working.

Tallgeese wrote:

Mark Vanderhof wrote:

Are your legs tired? Oh, well, I'm not surprised; your thighs are almost comically muscular.

You must wash your pants with Windex, because something really smells like Windex.

Your father must have been a thief. I don't know, you just have the look of someone who was raised by criminals.

If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? That is to say, would you be offended by my comments, not would you physically hold your body against mine. Sorry for any confusion. Anyways, would you?

Do you have a little Italian in you? Really? Wait, what was your last name again? Oh, yeah, I guess that does sound Irish. Never mind.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I probably wouldn't. Can you imagine how much that would screw with everybody?

Are you from Tennessee? I hate people from Tennessee.

Excuse me; I seem to have misplaced my inmate number, which was assigned to me by this state's accursed penal system after it was discovered that I was indeed the "Fruit by the Foot Strangler." Can I borrow yours?

Can I borrow a quarter? I need to call my mother and tell her I've found the girl I'm going to annoy for the next 5-10 minutes.

You could also try:
"I'm your density!"

notJames wrote:

Nice shoes. Wanna smurf?

Alright, alright, spaaaaaaare me your life stoooooory. </Dr. Zoidberg>

Res, that sounds like good advice, but I don't think RRLLN was actually looking for help picking up girls.

"Didn't it hurt?..."

"...when you fell from heaven?"

I don't know if this is true - but a former online friend reported an incident in college where he was at a bar, and some guy used a cheesy pickup line on a girl next to him, resulting in the girl rolling her eyes.

He then started talking to her about cheesy pickup lines, and they were joking back and forth about cheesy pickup lines.

Then he "Wanna smurf"
She said "LOL - Only losers would use that one"
he said "Well, OK, but I'm being serious now. Wanna smurf"
She smiled and said "OK" and off they went.

My love for you is like diarrhea, I can't hold it in.

StaticAge wrote:

You could also try:
"I'm your density!"

"What was it George... bird watching?"



"What Lorainne, what?"

And just to contribute to this thread:
'I never met a woman who liked Jules Verne before'

Last edited by Macinjosh (2006-07-28 11:27 pm)

FridaY N IGHT,  Si drunk!!! Woohoo will you go home with me>11 YHeah baby''11]]HA HA H
I love your shoes. 
Windex.  Tallgeese!!

SUIBIMITTT!!!

resedit wrote:

OK - I know I'm no expert, but what I've found to be the best trick is to get the gal to talk about her trip to europe or mexico or wherever she went on vacation.

This causes a memory response of something she greatly enjoyed, and makes her much more receptive to talking and then a date.

Don't ask her about her family, not at first - there are a lot of disfunctional families, and you don't want to invoke that kind of response - even if it gives you an opportunity to be sympathetic, it still invokes negative memory response. If you know she gets along well with her family, then it is OK.

Plus, hearing about a vacation might actually be interesting.  Nobody gives a smurf about anybody's family.

I'll buy dinner if you'll make breakfast.

"Woman, I would date with thee"