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There should never be pressure to find someone. Both times I've found someone, in fact, have been periods where I've had the attitude of "smurf women. I'm gonna hang out alone for a while." Most notably, this strategy failed about a month ago quite miserably and has unexpectedly led to me being quite happy. I feel bad because she's in love for the first time and now I'm shipping myself off to the Marines sometime in November I believe...

I tend to have a lot emotionally invested in the person I love, and for good reason. I love them. The stories of Susy Lou etc are simply cases where one person was not content with the relationship and failed to adequately communicate that point to the other person. That leads to the breakup seeming sudden and out of nowhere. Fun stuff, really.

Aaaaany way. I don't know what you mean by "such an age." I feel that for my age (of which, specifics will not be disclosed) it is most certainly possible to be in love. I even think it is possible in High School, though at that age we generally don't have the social ability and experience to create a long-lasting relationship.

Damn, I could go on about this stuff forever, and I don't know half as much as any of these people who've been around far longer than I. This actually could be thread-atapulted to Unplugged where you'll get more experienced answers...

No kidding. You can't teach relationships. Only failing many many times results in anything. Most of it is luck.

I recommend you just go out there and live your life. You cannot teach it to anybody.

A solution, PhasedRyan, would be that after striking up a conversation with a girl would be to stick around and talk rather than wandering away after you've said your piece and then watching her from the bushes.

NAG wrote:

No kidding. You can't teach relationships. Only failing many many times results in anything. Most of it is luck.

Nag, unfortunately many do it the way you described, and repeat the same scenario (usually negative) over and over. Plus, they accumulate a lot of negative baggage.


I think you can give advice but, who takes advice especially today.

I think much but not all depends on the individuals upbringing, and his/her particular culture.

I think...

Couples should know how each feels on important subjects like...

Is it a casual relationship or a more serious one?

Having children

What each wants from each other, and the world.

How each feels about money.

Educational, and religious differences.

I'm throwing this in... Who is the leader, and who is the follower in the relationship, and the way of interaction with the world.

But, too many just seem interested in the tingle when they mingle.

Last edited by Evesapple (2007-08-24 9:58 am)

Evesapple wrote:

NAG wrote:

No kidding. You can't teach relationships. Only failing many many times results in anything. Most of it is luck.

Nag, unfortunately many do it the way you described, and repeat the same scenario (usually negative) over and over. Plus, they accumulate a lot of negative baggage.


I think you can give advice but, who takes advice especially today.

I think much but not all depends on the individuals upbringing, and his/her particular culture.

I think...

Couples should know how each feels on important subjects like...

Is it a casual relationship or a more serious one?

Having children

What each wants from each other, and the world.

How each feels about money.

Educational, and religious differences.

I'm throwing this in... Who is the leader, and who is the follower in the relationship, and the way of interaction with the world.

But, too many just seem interested in the tingle when they mingle.

Eh? All of those things depend on the situation and couple. Not all aspects are relevant.

Nefarious wrote:

Evesapple wrote:

But, too many just seem interested in the tingle when they mingle.

nice rhyme

Thanks

Just  two words from one of my poems. *giggles*

NAG wrote:

Evesapple wrote:

NAG wrote:

No kidding. You can't teach relationships. Only failing many many times results in anything. Most of it is luck.

Nag, unfortunately many do it the way you described, and repeat the same scenario (usually negative) over and over. Plus, they accumulate a lot of negative baggage.


I think you can give advice but, who takes advice especially today.

I think much but not all depends on the individuals upbringing, and his/her particular culture.

I think...

Couples should know how each feels on important subjects like...

Is it a casual relationship or a more serious one?

Having children

What each wants from each other, and the world.

How each feels about money.

Educational, and religious differences.

I'm throwing this in... Who is the leader, and who is the follower in the relationship, and the way of interaction with the world.

But, too many just seem interested in the tingle when they mingle.

Eh? All of those things depend on the situation and couple. Not all aspects are relevant.

True

My general advice to people who struggle with intimate relationships:

You can't love someone else unless you love yourself first.  It's cliche, but it's true.  You have to like yourself, you have to be able to entertain yourself, and you have to be able to depend on yourself before you can expect to share any of those things with another person and have a healthy relationship.

Once you're in a good relationship, follow the golden rule and treat your partner in the same way that you would hope to be treated.  That's a lot of work!  It involves listening, compromising, forgiveness, and sometimes a little "tough love". 

If you're very fortunate, your romantic partner will also be your best friend and share your same interests.  I personally couldn't imagine it any other way. 

All these things are possible for two people who are both willing to put in the effort it takes to make it work.  Don't give up!

NAG wrote:

Most of it is luck.

And I call absolute BS on that.  Good relationships have extremely little to do with luck and almost everything to do with mutual hard work and thoughtfulness.

Alien wrote:

Just get her drunk and stick your tongue down her throat.

Then wait and see if she actually does leave her husband and sticks around. If not, move on to greener pastures.

,xtG
.tsooJ

I'd skip step 1 to get a more animated reaction.