This week, we're looking for any excuse to play the new Madden on our iPads during work. So, we wrangled up a thinly disguised sportcentric Game Time focusing on all sorts of sport games on iOS devices. This not only allowed us to play tons of Madden, but also pick up some incredibly obscure games to make fun of. If you make it to the end, you’ll be rewarded with a pretty detailed look at EA’s brand new Madden 2011 for iPad.
Curling seems like a good, if somewhat obvious choice for a weird games round up. But Virtual Curling is not a fun sport, even if you can get past the obnoxiously awful sound effects (you can’t) or the mediocre layout (you definitely can’t). The puck always lands exactly where you point it to, which means you never really need to use the sweeper-broom things. The biggest problem with “Virtual Curling” is that it costs actual money.
Curling: It’s not just something you do with your hair.
Check it out if: You need curling at any cost.
Worth the price: Nope.
With popular opinion divided regarding rugby’s place in American society, its nice to see that there is at least one thing that everyone can agree on: Nobody has any idea what’s going on. Well, that’s why Flick Kick Rugby is so perfect in all of its simplicity. Take away the players, the confusing lines on the field, and those wacky helmet-earmuff things and all you have to do is kick the ball through a pair of uprights. We’re not really sure if that’s something that happens in real rugby, but who cares?
Editor’s high score: 22 on sudden death
Check it out if: you realllly need a rugby fix on the go.
Worth the price: It’s a polished time waster for sure.
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You really can’t go wrong with a game called “Jumpy Horses.”
Editor’s… other…. high score: TOTALLY AWESOME!
Check it out if: you have a daughter that wants a pony.
Worth the price: hahahaha
Skate It! Is the mobile version of EA’s insanely cool console skateboarding game. Wherein the console version utilizes controls tighter than the Hulk’s shorts, Skate It! opts for the “barely functions” approach we’ve come to expect from so many iPhone ports.
What do you mean that’s not a move? Of course it is. I would know--I skateboard.
When busted controls get you down, you can take to the lovingly broken character editor. This, unlike the skateboarding part of the game, is fun. You see, one of the most innocent delights of Skate It! is just how absurdly dreadful it looks. Let me put it like this:
Skate It! looks like a mediocre outing on a Nintendo 64, but don’t be fooled into thinking this is a bad thing. The polygons are so sharp (almost dangerous) that it’s literally impossible to make something that looks even remotely human, which is kind of awesome.
Look, Skate It! has a creature creator, just like Spore! Alternate joke: The resemblance to me is uncanny.
Check it out: if you wanna sk8 or di3.
Worth it at full price? No.
Okay, so it's possible this whole “sports” theme is just a façade to introduce you to the new Madden game, which is quite possibly the best looking sports game on the iPad. I mean, sure, character renders are a little sharp and last generation, but the fact that this thing runs on an iPad is shocking (the iPhone version looks really good too) .
The controls are very intuitive. Passing is done via a quick tap to an open receiver. If they’re heavily defended, they’re squared off with a red square, when they’re in medium coverage, it’s a yellow square. If your receivers are out of your line of vision, you can tilt the iPad to pan left or right. This is one of the most realistic passing styles we’ve seen in any game, not just on iOS device.
Check it out: if you like football.
Worth the price: Every second of every day.
That’s it for this week’s Game Time. We hope it was everything you’d ever hoped for. Until next time, sports fans.
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